If you’ve heard of the raw milk phase but haven’t a clue as to where it came from, look no further. The culprit is our minuscule, maple-obsessed state to the far North, AKA Vermont. I’m not sure why anybody would choose to drink raw milk, but really, Vermont just takes their whole love of all things local, organic, and farm-to-table too far.
Drinking unpasteurized nutrients from a wrinkled cow udder. We have no problem with being more environmentally friendly and knowing where our food comes from. But we do have a problem with dying and diarrhea from E. coli.
Texas -- Frito Pie
We have absolutely nothing against Fritos. They are perfectly salty and a great chip for some dip. But, Texans like to act like their state is a bastion of haute cuisine. Austinites in particular will poo-poo a taco from literally anywhere but Austin. So, we'd like to take the time to so graciously remind them that they've also given us the wild Frito pie.
It's basically a casserole made with processed corn chips. And there you have it. That's all it is. We're just a bit surprised that it originates in Texas and not Missouri, to be honest. We did have higher hopes for Texas.
Utah -- Jell-O Salad
If you ever dream of taking a step back to the 1950s and don't want to wait around for a time machine to be invented, then you might want to visit Utah. Utah residents eat more Jell-O per capita than any other state in America. They love the gelatinous dessert so much that they even have Jell-O-themed legislation and a Jell-O week is a thing. When the Olympic Games came to Salt Lake City in 2002, there was an officially licensed Jell-O pin.
If you consider that 62% of Utah's population is Mormon, you can safely assume that a lot of Mormons are eating Jell-O. What other dessert is better to bring to large church gatherings where you need to feed plenty of mouths on a tight budget? Some Jell-O here and there (like when you're barfing and can't stomach anything else) is okay. But Utah goes overboard in a major way.
Virginia -- Brunswick Stew
If you think this looks unappetizing, that's because it is. It's basically overcooked veggies and chicken drowning in broth. Its original version was even more revolting and was made with squirrel, which is how you know this didn't come from one of the nice parts of Virginia.
But, people back then had to resort to using the ingredients they had access to. Needless to say, veganism wasn't all the rage.
Washington -- Green Tea and Pea Soup
This should actually be called Green tea and PEE soup. Green tea tastes like pee. Pea soup tastes like something that a lunchroom lady would plop on your plate in the dreaded cafeteria.
Combining the two together? WHY? Why would somebody do such a thing? I wouldn't eat this if it was the last thing left on this earth.