That’s right. If you can’t find a way to afford a headstone, a graveyard will tell everyone you didn’t invest properly. No, we kid, we kid – this is clearly the name of a family that has yet to pass on, so it’s blank for now.
This might be a larger family plot since that headstone on the left also bears the name “Poor.” These poor, poor people will eventually have to take their place in the ground just like the rest of us, but until then, they leave a somewhat chuckle-worthy headstone for others to puzzle over.
There Are Always Bad Names
Plenty of kids have goofy names they'll blame their parents on once they grow up. Probably while in therapy. But this didn't start in the twenty-first century, as this headstone can attest. A family with the last name "York" thought it would be a gas to name their son “New,” and nobody stopped them.
New York had to go through eighty-two years of life with that kind of name. It's possible he changed his name to this, but we can't think of any reason why, unless he was some kind of performer, and you'd think the headstone would mention that.
A Friend to the End
There are lots of good boys out there, and it's clear that this one is one of the goodest. Instead of flowers, people bring sticks to this dog's grave, and nobody has the heart to remove them, so the pile just grows and grows.
The dog's name is Rex, which we think is one of the classic dog names, up there with Spot. What could this dog have done to deserve such an esteemed statue of himself? Did he save lives? Was he a search and rescue dog? Maybe he was just that great to be around.
The Hypochondriac's Creed
After forty-seven years, Helen Linley was the expert on her body. She'd gone through illnesses and diseases, maybe broken bones or other trips to the emergency room, and she was pretty certain she was sick. And look at that, she was. Pretty darn sick, in fact.
She decided the best way to have the last laugh over the people who didn't believe her was to add that fact to her headstone to ensure everyone who visits her remembers that they didn't trust her intuition. The next time you hear someone say she might be sick, give it a second thought.
Bringing Back a Classic
Just based on the available options, they have a fifty-fifty chance. Here's an example of a pithy quote that you, too, can put on your headstone if you don't want anybody to know any of the details of your life and are unoriginal.
That many words take up quite an amount of space on a headstone, and sometimes there isn't a lot to work with, so if you want this kind of sentiment, you're going to have to sacrifice something. Nobody really needs to know when you died, do they? You're dead; what's the point of knowing the actual day?