There was a very close call here between Chicago hot dogs and pizza, but the hot dogs took the win. These hot dogs should be renamed “everything but the kitchen sink” because they are exactly alike. It seems like it’s some sort of sacrilege there to pollute your hot dog with something poisonous like ketchup.
The Chicago hot dog which has the full assembly is said to be “dragged through the garden” thanks to its many toppings. The hot dog got its inspiration from the “Depression Sandwich,” which we think says it all in itself.
Iowa -- Fried Butter
It seems like you were much too preoccupied with the endless possibilities of butter, that you overlooked the whole part about creating something disastrous and even more detrimental to one's health. Fried butter isn't a new concept, but, taking a whole stick of butter, dipping it in a cinnamon honey batter and deep-frying it is a new sugary and entirely bad for your concept.
Unsurprisingly, it can be found at the Iowa State Fair. For four dollars you can cause serious harm to your life. My cholesterol levels are going up simply from looking at these words. You've never heard anybody say "hmm, I wonder why American has such a problem with obesity?" And it's for reasons such as this.
Indiana -- Brain Sandwiches
There are some foods that shouldn't be put on a dinner plate, and brain makes the top (HA!) of our list. Now, making a brain sandwich... what in the world? I knew that people in the Hoosier state were gross... I mean we're talking about a state that gave us Mike Pence. But, this takes things to a whole new level.
Luckily, these sandwiches aren't found everywhere in the state, but they are found particularly in the south of Indiana in and near Evansville with the Hilltop Inn being the most famous place to dine on some brains.
Idaho -- Ice Cream Potato
Idaho, we know that you have no claim to fame other than potatoes. We are truly grateful that you supply us with so many potatoes because they are really an all-around great food. They can be creamy, crunchy, soft, and be used as a base for so many things. But, potatoes under ice cream? Is this some sort of April fools joke? It's not, actually.
It's not ethical to the potato and it's surely not healthy. Idaho, we know you have potato pride but the fact that you give us potatoes is enough.
Hawaii -- Spam Musubi
This is an open letter of apology to everyone from Hawaii who eats spam. I am sorry. I really am. I'm sorry that you eat it, I'm sorry that you think it tastes good, and I'm sorry that you think it's food. But, I will not believe you. Your canned meat is sickening.
And I'm sorry for those of you who go to Hawaii expecting to enjoy a nice relaxing time on the beach with maybe even a massage and instead face confrontation by ukuleles and spam. A complete vacation ruiner. For those coming from the mainland (i.e. most of us in the country) they call it mystery meat.