Turns out that chemistry provides quite a lot of material, not only literally, but also figuratively – since there are quite a lot of chemistry-based jokes on this fine list. This joke includes three different chemical elements, each sounding like a different English word.
“Helium” sounds a lot like “heal ’em,” “curium” sounds a lot like “cure ’em,” and “barium” sounds a lot like “bury ’em.” We assume you get why it’s funny now.
As aspiring gold diggers (hey, don't judge), this chem-based joke is one of our favorites. Let us enlighten you: in the periodic table, AU stands for gold. And… what does "Ey you" sound like? That's right.
Now, read the joke once more. Get it? The real tragedy is, that the bartender was probably just calling some inebriated dude out on their behavior, and poor goldy left because of a simple misunderstanding. Hey, we're always willing to have you, old friend!
Keira or Scarlett?
We have a special affection for this clever pun since understanding it requires a few layers of cinematic, literary, and linguistic knowledge. Let's break it down for you: "Pride and Prejudice" is a novel written by Jane Austen and adapted into a film (more than once, but the well-known version is the one with Keira Knightly as the lead).
This film has nothing to do with the 2003 drama "Lost in Translation" starring Scarlett Johansson, but when you combine "the Austen" in French (L'Austen) with "translation" (i.e., subtitles), and say the whole phrase out loud, it sounds exactly the same.
The Corner of Schrodinger and Pavlov
The creator of this joke has been showing off with not one, but two different smart people references! The first one has to do with Pavlov, the behavioral psychologist who got dogs to associate their food with the sound of a ringing bell.
The second one has to do with Schrodinger, the physicist who put a cat inside a closed box and theorized that until he opens it, the cat is both dead and alive at the same time (don't ask us how or why we're not that smart). When you know all that, the joke suddenly makes sense!
2+1 = … 0?
This smart joke is especially cool since it combines biology, physics, and math. So, naturally, a biologist tries to explain the mismatch in the number of people walking in and out of the house using biology, and a physicist tries to justify it using physics.
Only the mathematician loses sight of the question and turns the whole thing into an arithmetic problem: if 2 people walked into the house, and 3 people walked out, the number of people inside the house is now -1. So, if one more person walks in, we get 0.