There are some cool old words in there, so go ahead and look them up. We’ll wait. Aren’t words fun? In case you’re still a bit confused by this wording, this will comes from one Henry Budd, who left his substantial estate, holdings, and funds to his son…as long as his son kept his lip clean of any and all hair.
Should a mustache ever appear there, the son won’t get one hairy cent. We’re unsure exactly when this will was written, but it seems to be a bit older than a lot of the other examples here. Don’t worry mustaches, your time in the sun will come soon.
Getting in One Last Crack
Even if you've done everything else right, kids can still be a struggle. You might have married the love of your life, created a successful business, became a famous artist of some kind, but those kids still won't be any good. It happens to a lot of people.
The guy who left this will must have had to think on this for a long time since one of the things he left to his eldest daughter was something she could use to give herself a vibe check. Did she? No, probably not. The eldest children tend not to take the advice of others, especially not their dads.
There's Always Something Good in the Honey Pot
Well isn't that just the most great-uncle thing someone could possibly do. Not only did he spend his life stopping the spread of the gub'ment, but he also decided to get their goat one last time after he had moved on to the great barbecue party in the sky. Indeed, it was the prime contents of the outhouse that the rulers of the land received.
Y'all want to treat the water? Go on and treat that water. Still, the kids of the great-uncle did something in the letter of the law if not the spirit by boxing up the uncle's books inside the outhouse. How big was this outhouse? Well, you do need reading material.
Oh, Don't Worry, You're Getting Something All Right
Apparently, this is a well-known tactic to make sure an estranged child gets exactly what he or she deserves, while the other or others actually do get what they deserve. By making sure the estranged child is named and given something, it makes it much more difficult for them to raise a stink and create a legal battle.
What's better in this story is that the will states the son will get a dollar for reasons he knows. If he wants to dispute it, he might have to make those reasons known publicly. If they're embarrassing, or he wants to keep them private for another reason, he'll take the one dollar and like it.
The Tricks of the Trade
Grampa knew how to get ahead in business, and he was sure to pass on the tactics to his kin after he was gone from the Earth. Such family treasures are going to go to good use – this is the kind of tie that would also be a great addition to a stuffy wedding outfit.
Of course, the use in business is still quite an option, though there are plenty of other, far more ridiculous ties that you can find nowadays thanks to the internet. A bunch of pink elephants on a blue background seems almost quaint compared to some of the eye-popping options out there now. But still, a nice gift.
No Love Lost There
It's a sad fact of life that mothers and daughters don't always get along. Sure, some of them get along like a house on fire, but then there are those that are more likely to actually set the house on fire. This is one such example, with the mother of the equation refusing to give her daughter so much as a bent penny.
She didn't even want the daughter at her funeral – didn't even want the daughter to know she had passed until after she was in the ground. Things must have been cold to spend so much legal real estate making sure she got the point across.
I'm Keeping the Peepers
We could dive deep into some religious discussions here – is the state of your physical body important for any potential afterlife? – but we'll leave that for the more learned masters out there. This lady chooses to give freely of whatever bits might help someone else, but not her eyes. She's keeping those.
To be fair to the mother-in-law, there are quite a few times when an eye transplant can end up saving someone's life – there are actually glass eyes that look almost exactly like the real thing. I should know, I have two of them.
Getting the Last Laugh
The way we see it, the reveal of this will could be both the final scene in the movie or the very first scene in the movie. Family feuds are the things of legends sometimes, and something that ended in this way must have had an incredible build-up toward this finish. Still, it looks like dear old Dad got the better of his son at the end.
Death tends to be that way. While we might only be getting one side of the story from the will, it kind of looks like the son was not acting in the way of a gentleman, to put it lightly, and thus got what he deserved.
I Need to Buy Some Birthday Presents
A will has a lot of potential for drama, as our entertainment so often tells us. Art became life in this story when the grandson of the will-writer discovered he has an adopted brother out there somewhere, much to his surprise. Why would Dad keep such a secret for so long? Well, it had been so long before the second son was born, maybe they had just decided it wasn't worth the confusion.
Maybe the adopted son proved to be not so nice – that would also explain why the adopted son didn't get anything in the grandfather's will. Still, there's always a chance this led to a family that came back together.
A Tale of Two Inheritances
Hey, don't knock a Furby. In mint condition, an original Furby can get you...fifty dollars. Well, that's still something. A nice meal, maybe. Of course, the real tale here is the giant taxidermied moth, which has got to be one of the most boss things a person can add to their home.
Is it trapped behind a glass case, as is so often the case with bugs, or is it free to place anywhere in the home like a stuffed animal? We hope this person's friends and family aren't weirded out by that. They probably are, but we can still hope.
The Fighting Must Stop!
There are lots of things that will happen after someone dies. The will is read, people fight over the items inside. It's as normal as peanut butter and jelly. This grandfather had a way around all of that because he knew that family shouldn't worry about possessions like simple pieces of furniture.
This grandchild would be the arbiter of peace, taking the fought-over furniture and getting rid of them for good. As far as we can tell, the stipulation that the grandchild burns the furniture is right in the will, so he has to, or his grandfather will haunt him until he does. Sorry, we don't make the rules.
Everything Left to be Said
This upstanding gentleman of a grandfather combined the best of both worlds when it comes to wills. Not only did he dish out the goods to a well-deserving grandchild, but he also left some harsh truths for a few other members of the family, including his girlfriend and what we can only assume is one of his own children.
In fact, for the grandchild to receive all of the amazing things grandpa left – practically enough for him to set up his own repair shop – there was a real, actual script to follow. Would this stir up some emotions? Sure, but that's exactly what Grandpa wanted.
A Priestly Payout
This man of God understood the power that money can hold over people. Maybe he had seen it during his time as a shepherd of men, maybe he had suffered from it himself. The revelation that he was giving a full grand away to anyone who honored him after his passing caused plenty of consternation to people who didn't have the mind to attend, with plenty of excuses coming after the fact.
We can only point out that this was exactly the priest's point – if you were only going to attend because you would get the money, you don't deserve the money.
This Is Going to Be Fun
It seems like this grandmother loved her grandchild quite a bit. A third of the life insurance? That's pretty good. All the stuff in the house? Even better. The house itself? Now that's a life-changing gift. Even if the grandchild doesn't want the house, that could be hundreds of thousands of dollars to add to the bank account.
Of course, all that money will be to get away from the parents after the grandchild relays Grandma's message about her son-in-law. We have no idea what happened to make Grandma think this way, but it must have been pretty bad. All the guy wanted was a table, but he can't even have that.
A Splitting Remark
This will is rather simple in its execution. Split up with that girl, and you get the house. Otherwise, it all goes to the church. That's it. That's all. There's nothing else. We wish we could know more about the backstories to some of these wills since we bet there is enough for a thrilling dramatic novel included here, but it would be pretty hard to distill all that info.
What could have happened in the past to encourage this sort of behavior? It could have been anything. Maybe Misses B just went to the wrong church. We hope that Mister A stuck with his wife. But maybe the relationship was already on the rocks.
A Last-Second Change
Writing up a will takes hours of hard work and tough thought, and there are plenty of ways to get it wrong on the first pass. That's why you do it before you're on your deathbed. This guy wanted to make sure that his most prized possessions were put to good use – if his son married a vegan, his smoker would languish somewhere, gathering dust.
That just wouldn't do! Make sure it goes to the daughter instead, since her entire family has a healthy appreciation for smoked stuff. Probably. They will after they start using the smoker, at least.
Candy for the Grandkids
He just wanted the kids to have some chocolate – what's so wrong with that? Lots, apparently, since some of the cousins of the storyteller had done their best to disappear. This slowed things down for months, much to everyone's annoyance.
There's a reason why you have a lawyer to help you write one of these things – odd requests such as this one can make things far more difficult than you might think, eating into a lot of money and time. For some reason, the lawyer in charge of the will had no problem with it. We can't imagine why.
Oh...Cool
Thanks, Grandpa. We get that there are members of your family that you might not get with all that well, but if that's the case, just say they don't get anything. Kidney stones are one of the less-desired gifts no matter the occasion.
Finding out that the only thing you're getting from your departed grandfather is something that had to be removed from his body (and not even anything cool, like a heart) is going to make sure that gift goes right into the trash can. It's not exactly going to get the grandchild to change his opinion on you, old man. Probably.
They're Going to Come Back, I Swear
There are a couple of stories about the departed leaving old toys to people in their wills, but Furbys seem to make an unexpected number of appearances. These things weren't Beanie Babies even when they came out, and there's no way they retained the value that the original buyers were expecting. They might have flown off the shelves during their heyday, but there's not much else that people remember them for.
Still, this person left every single one of his or her Furbys in the will, which still might net the recipient a couple of hundred dollars. And hey, maybe one of those electronic animals does have a little bit more value than the rest.
A Family Tradition
A lot of these will stories have grumpy family members fighting over something, estranged children getting a solitary dollar, and more things of the like. Problems, issues, arguments. Not this one. No, this one is heartwarming and fun – a pair of socks passed down from one family member to the next to continue a Christmas tradition.
The person relating the story is next in line for the storied socks, but what happens if they start to come apart? Is there a stipulation in the will for replacing them if they become unusable as socks? We all know it happens. Odds are you have a couple in your sock drawer that are growing holes in the toes or heels.
Don't Be Mad at Me!
Remember, kids: being nice to your parents might just be worth it. Be a jerk, on the other hand, and you'll get one dollar with a letter stating the reasons why. This has the potential to sour quite a lot of relationships for the person who got everything else, but it's not like it's that person's fault.
He or she was a good son or daughter and reaped the benefits. Of course, odds are “everything” here is a tidy sum. A little windfall, but it's not like the person will be able to buy a mansion. Hopefully enough to buy some extra home security if anything. This person might need it.
Throwing Everybody for a Loop
We're having a hard time wrapping our heads around how much work this must have been for both of these army vets. Instead of showing your family how to be neighbors and friends with someone you've gone through hell with, they pretended to hate each other whenever someone was within earshot.
The dedication. The nerve. And the REVEAL! How shocked both families must have been to find out that the men actually were quite fond of each other. How much we'd give to be a fly on the wall during those discussions. We'd remember the reactions for the rest of our lives. So would they, if we're being honest.
Time to Turn up the Heat
This pre-mortem will-reading turned into the roasting hour at the comedy club, and the grandmother was so proud of what she had come up with that she couldn't even wait until she had passed on for everyone to hear it. Was this a sneaky tactic to push her children to be better and make up for past mistakes? Or was it a heavy-handed crack at them after a lifetime of suffering through their nonsense?
We may never know. As the storyteller relates, all of the reasoning was quite fair – or at least perfectly legal for the will to include. Responsibility goes a long way, everybody.
Everyone Cover Your Food
A whole lot of these stories have to do with the possessions that a person has accumulated over their life or their money. Few of them have to do with how to dispose of the remains, but here's an example. Spreading the ashes in a certain place is actually quite a common, reasonable ask as long as it isn't something like “on the moon.”
Then again, sitting down to a relaxing meal at the beach and seeing someone spread the cremated remains of a past guest is going to put you off your meal in a big way. We don't know how this was dealt with, but hopefully, they waited until the restaurant was closed.
Poetic, in a Way
Now here's a will we can get behind. This guy took the time to craft jabs straight to the heart of the two people that needed them the most, his wife and his son. He wasn't the cuckold he seemed to be, and he wanted his son to get to work and stop being a bum. Sentiments we can all agree with.
When you're writing your will, don't be crude – tell it like it is, but keep your language in such a way that tells the readers you were never someone they could easily take advantage of. Hit the lazy and the cheater where it hurts. They might just be able to turn their lives into something a little better.
You Want Twenty Dollars? Here are Twenty Dollars
What are twenty dollars between families? A lot, apparently, since this woman left her daughter the same amount that the aunt had pilfered. Was there any message relayed with the money? Something to remind the thieving woman why it was this amount and nothing more or less? We cannot say.
I'll give you all the twenty dollars you want, honey. We wonder what other elements of vindictiveness this woman included in her last will and testament. It would be impossible for us to guess. Let that be a lesson to you, Aunty. Maybe keep those hands to yourself.
All for the Donkeys
We aren't going to try and figure out why this woman left all her money to a sanctuary for donkeys, but there's probably a pretty good reason. Maybe a donkey saved her life once. They were climbing up the Grand Canyon, and the grandmother slipped. The donkey stomped a sure-footed hoof down on the edge of the grandmother's sleeve, saving her from slipping down into a deadly fall.
She promised on that day that donkeys would have everything she could accumulate in life in order to repay them for this kindness granted her. Or maybe she just thought they were cute, we don't know.
Let the Water Flow
While not a last will and testament, we find that this story still fits the bill, since it pretty much works in the same manner. The deed to this land had a very specific stipulation, that of a water fountain for man and beast, or it could have reverted to the family.
Cities seem to dislike it when their property becomes private again, so they made sure to follow the requirements to the letter, installing a classic water fountain where people could wet their whistles and fill up a dog bowl as well. There's nothing like a water feature for a public park.
A Little Bit Extra
This story doesn't have a will, but it very well could have been a message in a will, and it happened after someone departed from this mortal plane, so we're counting it. Alyce got to cash in big-time thanks to her husband's winnings, and he left her a very sweet note at the same time.
We don't know how she went about claiming all that money so long after the tickets had been purchased, but if the story is to be believed it equaled a tidy sum of money. Hubby might have even been able to skirt around some of the taxes that come with inheritance thanks to this clever ploy.
Setting Down the Rules
Great-grandad seemed like the kind of guy that set fair rules of play above winning. The kind of guy that celebrates a loss as long as it was a good game. All he had to do to make sure nobody was upset about their inheritance was add a small clause that created some easy-to-understand ground rules. If you have a problem with your share, you're going to get less, and there's nothing you can do about it.
It seems to us that the kind of family that would need this clause is the kind that has a lot to gain, so Great-grandpa probably went about this the right way to keep things friendly.
Just Take the Money, Man
Yeah, he absolutely would lose, because there's no way he can actually sue for anything. What's he going to go with? “My siblings also got the same money I did”? Naw, buddy, any judge with half a brain cell would throw that case right out and give you a nice tongue lashing at the same time. But can we talk about that amount for a moment? Fifty K for thirty years is one and a half million dollars.
Almost ANYBODY would be over the moon to get that kind of payout! What's this guy's deal? Plus, the siblings (at least two) also got the same amounts, meaning the parents were multi-millionaires. That's quite the God Family you have there.
Uneven Distribution
There's no explanation why this person got a grand of grandma's cash. There were plenty of explanations for why other people only got a penny, which might as well be nothing these days thanks to the inflation. But as for why this one grandchild got a big payout, it's hard to say. Maybe she called her grandma more than once a year? Hint hint for those of you who still have grandparents.
Everyone who got a penny also got a mean comment along with it, so maybe we can just chalk this one up to eccentricity on the grandma's part. A lot of wills here contain at least a little bit of that.
A Brief Pet
First, it's quite strange to leave a goose to someone, especially if it can just fly away and never return. What kind of goose was it? It doesn't matter, they're all monsters. If you ever have to deal with Canadian Geese, you know it to be true. Second, your grandmother's step-father's brother? What's going on there? Do most people get along that well with their step-great-great-granduncle?
And why does he have a goose? The more we think about this, the more questions we're coming up with. Maybe this is just one to leave alone. It's either that or finding a way to keep a goose from flying away, and that's too much work.
Make Sure It Gets Plenty of Exercise
We think that this lady might not understand how much a fish can do. Is avocado even something that a fish can or should eat? We've never even tried. After a little bit of research, it turns out that avocado contains a toxin called persin, which is deadly to cats, dogs, mice, horses, birds, and, yes, fish.
So this lady set up a very big trust for a fish that is not going to last very long. And why would she ask for a dog walker to take care of the fish? Shouldn't someone who has some sort of expertise in taking care of fish be a better suggestion?
The Line of Succession
Sad news for this person, who lost both father and grandmother and a father in only a month's time. The emotions were compounded by having to suddenly deal with the estates from not only the father but the grandmother as well. Due to a stipulation of the grandmother's will, the money moved right to the coffers of the grandchildren, bypassing the father of the storyteller entirely.
If the father also had a will, this must have been an incredibly trying time. Dealing with wills is never a fun event, and having to deal with two at the same time is doubly unfun.
Where She Could Be Best
This story comes from a farmer who wanted to make sure that his only daughter didn't feel muscled out by the boys of the family. Indeed, he left the very important, expensive equipment to the daughter, since he wanted to make sure she was part of the family business.
There have been plenty of female farmers, and here's another one, even if she might not be the one working the land. Trust us, she's going to learn a whole lot about what it's like to be a farmer, whether she wants to or not. We guess she could just sell the equipment to the sons, though.
The Famous Cat House
There are a lot more of these people out there than you might guess at first. People who leave every cent they have toward a cat or dog or some combination of the two. Or, in this case, fifteen cats. Which is, we're going to go on record here, too many cats.
Still, this cat lady to end all cat ladies wanted to make sure her furry friends had a happy life even after she was gone, so she set up this trust. Even after the money had mostly run out, the cats get to finish out their time at a cat sanctuary, where they can run and play as long as they like.
It's Like a Game Show
Finding out you've been bequeathed a massive safe from a long-lost family is usually a pretty good thing to discover. Most of the time. Unless, of course, the safe is full of coins. Just coins! That's all. In this case, it turns out there were enough coins to equal several hundred thousand dollars, but they had to count all of it.
We hope they could at least make a game of it. For every thousand they count, they get...more coins! Yay! It might have been a lot of work, but it's also a lot of money, and that's got to be nice.
It All Goes to the Dog
Wanting to make sure your dog is well-cared-for after your death is a pretty normal thing. Usually, it's given to a friend or family member who will best be able to take care of the animal, maybe with a little bit of money to make things easier.
Usually, it's not all of the money that the person has, though. If it is, it's because the person doesn't have any children, or he doesn't have a good relationship with his children. In this example, it's just that the deceased really, really liked his dog. We can't argue too much – dogs are great.
Those Blue Suede Shoes Are Expensive
We don't know what to think about this one. Leaving everything in your estate to a single person is one thing, but leaving it all to an Elvis impersonator is another thing entirely. If he was really good, and he provided a lot of aid during dark times, sure, leave him a little bit of something for a job well done. But leaving him everything?
He must have been really, really good. Or, as the story relates, maybe this guy was just off his rocker. We all know someone who is the good kind of crazy, but we also know someone who is the bad kind of crazy. It's not always fun.
A Little Too Interested in Crime
Throw a stone and you'll probably end up hitting a fan of true crime podcasts or television shows. This is good because they deserve a knock on the head sometimes – this story is a pretty good example. A mother put a clause in her will that her children won't get anything if she dies under “suspicious circumstances,” which is how it's put when someone dies and no one knows why.
It could be poisoning, crime, or other things, but it's probably not going to happen. Actually, who would get the inheritance if she did die under suspicious circumstances? That's the person to watch out for.
Keep the Razor Close
There are some cool old words in there, so go ahead and look them up. We'll wait. Aren't words fun? In case you're still a bit confused by this wording, this will comes from one Henry Budd, who left his substantial estate, holdings, and funds to his son...as long as his son kept his lip clean of any and all hair.
Should a mustache ever appear there, the son won't get one hairy cent. We're unsure exactly when this will was written, but it seems to be a bit older than a lot of the other examples here. Don't worry mustaches, your time in the sun will come soon.
Alas, Poor John
Stagehand John Reed had spent his entire life working at the Walnut Street Theatre in Philadelphia, moving props around, setting up scenes, and wrangling divas and divos. He never got to break it big on the stage himself, but it seems he was content with that. However, his will had one request when it came to the theatre's next performance of the classic Shakespeare work “Hamlet.”
He wanted it to be his skull that was presented as that of Yorick, from what might be the most famous visual of the theater to ever come about. From what we can tell, the bequeathing was successful, but we don't know if the scene was ever performed.
A Holiday Just for You
Now, what's going on here? This fragment of a will comes from none other than Robert Louis Stevenson, famous writer and author of such classic tales as “Treasure Island.” A young friend of his, twelve-year-old Annie Ide, wasn't happy with her birthday, it being on Christmas day. Understandable, if you want a day all to yourself.
Upon Stevenson's passing, he willed the use of his birthday (November thirteenth, in case you wanted to know) to the girl, so she could celebrate in style. He just asked her to be gentle – that birthday has been through a lot, and it might not be able to handle a young girl's celebration.
Taking Flight. Or Not
Scattering ashes is one of the more regular ways to honor somebody. Sometimes it's at a certain place or in a certain manner, but from a certain vehicle is also an option, as in this case. Problem was, the person who was supposed to do the scattering didn't know how to fly one of these little aircraft – and it's not like you can hire a pilot. These tiny planes have room for one person and one person only.
A loophole in the clause smoothed everything out, but we have to think it kind of goes against the spirit of the will to just open the door and dump the ashes on the ground. Well, you do what you can, we guess.
That Will Show Them
How DARE you give us cats! That would be one thing, but not letting them get rid of them? You do know you're still the parents in this situation, right? You can get rid of the cats. You don't have to follow your kids' rules, even if they are adults. By definition, you are also an adult.
Well, the parents got the last laugh here by leaving their spawn with nothing but the mangy beasts to take care of. All the expensive artwork and money went to other, more deserving people. If you want to get pets for your parents, make sure they actually want them, first.
The Lending Library
This lady is getting ready to share her most treasured possessions with the people she finds to be the most worthy. Books are personal, important items in a lot of people's lives, and it seems this lady has taken that idea to its logical extreme. Not only does she have an incredible collection, but she also has very specific instructions for who gets what volumes. That is a LOT of books.
You might think you have a pretty hefty collection, but there's almost no way you have two thousand books unless your house is wall-to-wall bookshelves. Are these paperback novels? First edition hardcover? Manuals for toasters and microwaves? It could be anything.
Play Nice
If you're a brother, and you have brothers, you know that there can sometimes be contention. Little fights and squabbles that pop up just because they can. This mom wanted to make sure everybody was staying cool after she had passed, so she put this clause in her will.
Each son got a third of the house (we assume with a classic duct tape down the middle of the room situation), and if they didn't want to deal with it, they had to sell it on the cheap. If there are two brothers left and one of them wants to get rid of it, is that still only a dollar? The will didn't say, as far as we know.
The Inheritance Included a Calculator, Hopefully
Dementia is a pretty sad disease, but only having the math be wrong by five percent is still kind of impressive. We're not sure why the granddad decided that the first male grandkid gets it – it might have something to do with dementia. Maybe he just really wants a grandson to play catch with or teach about tools or how to make crepes or something like that.
We wonder if the math problems stay in the will after the deceased has passed – is that the kind of thing that the recipients have to suss out?
Sometimes Grandmothers Can be Sneaky
There are plenty of grandparents out there who just couldn't spread the wealth around enough. Maybe they have too many grandkids, or maybe they have too much wealth for it to ever be fair. Of course, no one said you have to be fair, so she also made one specific granddaughter the executor, and paid out a little bit for a job well done.
We bet that this caused a couple of questions to come up, no matter how sneaky Grandma tried to be. These wills tend to get read pretty closely, especially by those who want something.
Fighting Over Everything
This is so very strange and weird. We don't have all the information, but it seems almost like this pair were getting divorced, and had to figure out who got how much vanilla extract. Hey, Grandma, why on Earth do you have so much vanilla extract? We all love to make something with a bit of vanilla in it, but you don't ever really need that much.
More than fifty gallons is an absolutely immense amount of extract. Was she making her own? That's got to be an entire barrel! But don't worry, this guy got most of it for some reason. He could probably bathe in it.
Do they Eat Fresh Dolphins?
There are no cats that need that much money. Unless they're huge Siberian tigers and need to eat fifty pounds of raw meat every day. But if these animals are regular house cats, we can't imagine needing that much cash. Do they eat off of a new China plate for every meal? Are they chowing down on endangered animals?
We get that all that money is going to be for a number of years, but it still seems like a lot. Maybe the animals have health problems. Those can get pricey fast. “Current lifestyle” doesn't really make us think of costly vet visits, though.
They Are Very Fine Animals
Yeah, llamas are great, but it still seems a bit strange to leave a llama sanctuary a cool million in your will. Why did this mysterious great aunt have such an affinity for the long-necked animals? We couldn't possibly tell you, but she went the regular route of leaving each of her family members a little bit of cash so that they couldn't dispute the will.
We don't know how the family feels about that, but we might bet they were steamed over it. We hope that the llama sanctuary at least changed its name to honor the deceased.
Unexpected Gifts
The person who wrote this will either has a very strange sense of humor or really likes the person who is getting all this. Or really DOESN'T like the person. It's a little hard to tell. The person received someone else's summer cottage – is it available to give away? We don't know.
The person also received a neighbor's Corgi, which we're going to guess isn't something that the deceased can give away. Corgis are a good addition to the family, though. Finally, the beneficiary gets a dress that already has a buried body in it, so that one is probably going to not be claimed, no matter how nice it is.
A Loophole Keeps a Horse Alive
This might be one of the strangest asks that we've seen in a will for the list. The will asked that a woman's beloved horse be killed and cremated along with the woman, which seems a little mean, but thankfully there was a loophole. The will mentioned a specific horse, which had already passed away from natural causes.
The woman forgot (or simply decided not to) update the will, so the horse she got as a replacement wasn't in any danger. The horse got to continue its life on a different farm, free from at least one crazy horse lady. Keep your head on a swivel, horse – there are lots of other riders that you need to look out for.
Healthy No Matter What
Yes, at first glance this seems rather cruel, even excessive, but think about it. In the United States, seventy-four percent of people have more weight than their frames are built for. Depending on this woman's height and the weight limit the dad set, this could be him just looking out for his daughter's health.
Of course, it could also be a mean way to make her starve herself, but we don't know any of the details. It could have even been a very good thing – maybe the daughter was headed to her own early grave if she didn't shed some pounds.
From the History Books
We'd love to know how and why the will was set up this way. Our best interpretation is that the mom just wanted to make sure her son found a good woman to spend the rest of his days with. Thanks, mom. Well, lucky for her the son had already found a good woman, but the will hadn't been updated, intentionally or accidentally.
One last way for the mom to get a crack in at her daughter-in-law, or just a slip of the mind during her last years? This kind of thing is the reason why lawyers have to go to school for so long. To figure out these kinds of quandaries.
A Sad Tale
While this story is a little bit depressing, at least the person telling it has accepted the outcome with a stiff upper lip. This grandfather left handsome sums to everybody except one person, who he thought was ripping him off. It was actually the singular dollar recipient's father who had done the ripping off, but dementia is a terrible thing.
Thankfully, there were good things that the will did, such as distributing money to a sister who really needed it. Did the dad who did the initial ripping off get paid as well? That would be pretty unfortunate.
Woof?
Well now. This seems...like an interesting choice. Just like the pharaohs of old, this woman wanted her faithful animal to join her in the afterlife, whether or not the animal was dead when she passed. As dog lovers ourselves, we understand that we might miss our pets once we depart the mortal coil, but...the dog will join you eventually, lady, you don't need to speed anything along.
Well, if she didn't have any money for taking care of the dog, and none of the family wanted to take the pooch, this is one way around the “problem.”
A Secret From Beyond the Grave
A lot of people will end up taking certain secrets with them when they pass away. Others might take the opportunity for a final message to their loved ones to reveal this or that. Like this lady, who had a secret daughter for who knows how long, without anyone else in her family finding out about it.
The secret daughter is getting a little bit of money and some pictures, to make sure she knows the mother didn't forget about her, but it's still going to be an interesting conversation if this mother is the first to go in her family.
A House Built for One
If there's one thing that you should take from this collection of stories, it's that people really love their pets. Whether cat, dog, or something else entirely, people who are rich and don't have kids will do anything for their pets. That includes leaving them lots of money and a literal house for them to live out the rest of their furry lives in comfort, even if there's no one else there.
Pets – yes, even cats – are social creatures, so while we can't imagine this was all that exciting, at least the cat got to have the house all to itself.
One-in-a-Million
You know, most cats fall prey to the ravages of time once they hit their teen years. Some of them make it to the upper teens, maybe there are even a few that have made it to twenty. The cats from this story (we aren't sure how many) have not only lived past the age of twenty, but they've even changed color! It's amazing, isn't it?
It doesn't have anything to do with the fact that the people who live there would have to find different places to live and suddenly wouldn't have access to all that money. Nope. Just don't ask any questions.
The Joke's on Them
There's nothing like leaving a joke for people that will come after you. You might not get to see the results, but you know something good is going to happen. It's like sending laughter into the world, but you have no idea where it will land. This person wanted her remains to be spring-loaded to deliver a classic Hammer Films scare to people who might end up digging him or her up.
Of course, burials and funerals are already quite expensive, so there's a stipulation about money to just cremate in case funds wouldn't cover it. We'd love to be there to see this happen, but we doubt it will be any time soon.
The Feeling's Mutual, Buddy
Now, the story says the relationship was toxic, but this seems less like toxicity and more like a love-hate relationship. Of course, we don't have the whole story, so there's a very good chance that this relationship was quite toxic. The friend laughed, but maybe he was just being wistful about his deceased family member, no matter what their relationship was like when both were alive.
Fifteen grand is a nice amount, but tickets to hell come at a higher price. And then after all the River Styx and gates of Pandemonium and stuff like that, he'd have to fight his uncle. Is it really worth it?
Playing Pranks on the Remaining
There are plenty of people who have added some fun pranks to their wills. Maybe it's because they wanted to get their family and friends without a way to get them back, or maybe they just wanted to spread laughter one last time. This person has elected to have a mysterious dark-suited man to notify all the beneficiaries to, as far as we can tell, add some spooky mystery to the proceedings.
That's all, no other reason. This person is also going to give a middle school friend a cool ten bucks, for what appears to be no reason whatsoever.
Garbage in, Garbage Out
The dad might have spent eighteen years telling this will-writer to take out the garbage, but it looks like he or she is going to have the last laugh. Fathers and children don't always get along, but this seems like there is some extra backstory. We'd love to know it, but alas.
It's interesting that this person thinks the father will live longer than he or she will, but it might just be part of covering all the bases. What would make this even better is to fill the kitchen trash can with the grossest, stinkiest stuff if you know your time has come.
Read the Fine Print
All of the details of this will are quite in-depth and complicated, but it displays a certain amount of wit, humanity, and cheeriness on the part of the grandmother. She left a treasured beer recipe to one of the granddaughters since she has the best penmanship.
She also left some extra instructions to that same granddaughter, stating that she should reduce the potency of the recipe due to the uncle's desire for a strong drink. Uncle Teddy was, the story goes on to say, still there to hear the statement, and had a good laugh about it.
A Name Is Important
Names are the kind of thing that has a lot of emotional weight to them, but it's not often one is regulated so much in a will. Only one of the three children was allowed to name a grandchild after the mom and went into great detail about exactly why the other two sons weren't allowed to do so.
However, the story goes on to say that the person who related this story talked to an attorney about it, and there's no way this clause would be legally binding. There's really no way to stop or force people from naming their children certain things. See George Foreman.
When a Numismatist Passes
A numismatist is someone who collects coins (Another new word you have learned today). This coin-collector had huge sacks of change to disperse to all of his loved ones, and they weren't sorted or anything. There's no doubt some of these little pieces of circular metal had some value to them, but most were worth the amount stamped on them.
However, someone who collects so many coins is going to have some cool ones, such as a coin from what appears to be WWII Germany. We'd love to see what kind of metal bits each person was able to walk away with.
Technically Correct
Yeah, you're in my will. I mention you by name. This is another example of the classic tactic of making sure a person is named in the will (sometimes with a nominal inheritance like a dollar) so that the person can't dispute it, saying obviously the deceased would mention them – no matter how awful that person was to the deceased in real life.
This person, however, really just thinks it will be a lot of fun to have the people present hear their name and get nothing. Less than nothing. But, hey, you're in the will. That's got to count for something.
The Dead Need Things Too
Compos mentis means, in this example at least, that the person is in good mental health. That doesn't explain why the person left many of his things to people who were – at the time of the will's writing – already dead, but there's not much that can be done. The person had some kind of strange reason for wanting to leave earthly possessions to the previously deceased.
We couldn't guess it, but there must be SOME reason. You wouldn't just...leave a lot of stuff to dead people for no reason, would you? Would you?
Be Nice to Old Ladies
Usually, being nice to old ladies is its own reward, but sometimes it comes with some actual monetary rewards at the same time, such as in this example. A bus driver helped the lady on and off the bus, helped with her groceries, or whatever else, and she decided to leave him everything she had. A house and all her belongings, which would be a windfall for anybody.
For someone that drives a bus for a living (hey, no judgment, it's a very important job) this could be life-changing. Will the family contest the will? Almost certainly. But we hope that the bus driver got everything he or she deserved.
Very Specific Burial Clothes
Most people get buried in a nice dress or a classic suit, but there are some people that have more specific instructions for their final resting outfit. This airman, for instance, wanted blue jeans, a wrestling shirt, and a replica championship belt. Now that's a rad look for heading into the afterlife.
Thankfully, as the story relates, the airman finished his deployment safe and sound, which means this outfit remains unworn. Has he updated the will to change his outfit? Maybe get a more recent belt or a shirt that has a more recent wrestling champ? The story doesn't say.
Here Are My Two Cents
Siblings will always have a little bit of fight in them when it comes to disputes, but we have to admit that coming to blows over two pennies seems a bit petty. We might put that money in a savings account and hope it eventually earns enough to split evenly three ways, or somebody could take the higher road and let the other two siblings take a penny each.
Is a penny really going to get you anything, or make any noticeable change in your life whatsoever? No, it isn't, and all three of them should be ashamed. That's what we say about the issue.
Well, That's Quite a Shock
We really, really hope that nobody reading has to find out that they're adopted after their parents have passed. This interesting tale not only has this eye-popping revelation, but also the revelation that the adopted son won't be getting anything in the will. That's a rough couple of days.
The will did get contested – just over the amount, not that the biological son wasn't willing to give anything – but we don't know how it ended up. We also don't fully understand some of the legal terms, so your guess is as good – or better – than ours about the details.
Time to Get Healthy, Kids
Ah, moms. They want their kids to be at their best, even after they've shuffled off the mortal coil. This lady decided even though she was gone, she would force two of her sons to make the right choices for their lives. One of them had to face his fear and go under the dentist's drill, while the other had to throw out the snacks and hit the treadmill.
Both are good things to do with regularity. Actually, the wording of the story makes us think that only one son had his inheritance held, but one of the things that had to happen was his brother had to lose seventy pounds. That will increase the pressure.
Itemized Inheritance
If you really, really like your stuff, you want to make sure it goes to the right people. That will take some tough, thorough thought for a good number of the items. Of course, most of these items will be rather...unnecessary. Like in this story, which names things like a toilet paper holder or a magazine basket.
Some of those things will be quite well-liked, even if it's just because it's something the Grandma and Grandpa used to have. Some of them, on the other hand, will really just be some extra junk that is now taking up space in other people's homes. But that didn't stop this lady, nope.
Just Go and Have Some Fun
There's lots of stuff that gets related inside wills, from burial wishes to inheritance and more. In this case, it turned out to be quite a bit more casual than some of the other things on this list. Right after this man was buried, he wanted his family to go to the zoo. That's all. Maybe it was because he – or they – loved the zoo, and wanted to make sure that they got to enjoy it one more time for him.
Or, maybe they all hated each other, and this was his last attempt to get them to reconcile their differences by doing something that is usually pretty fun.
Still Has Her Fingers in the Pie
Moms are nosy kinds, and we've come to discover that there are plenty who will continue this tactic even after their demise. This mom wanted her daughter to divorce her husband in order to inherit part of the estate, even though the woman was perfectly happy with her beau. Or not willing to divorce him, anyway.
As the story relates, it's not legally enforceable for what is most likely a complicated legal reason. A will isn't a legally binding contract between people, and even caveats are likely to be shot down in court. These things are complicated.
Well, Needs Must
Since this is a famous case study, we have to imagine that the fender was treated as the legal will. How he managed to write it in the fender is beyond us – maybe he had a sharp tool or a pen with him. He might have written it with mud, or with...another liquid.
We guess if you're dying before your time and you have to write a will, you're going to do it in any way you can. Though it would be best to write it out beforehand so that the tractor can't exude any extra pressure on you. Leaving your entire estate to a tractor isn't even close to the weirdest thing we've seen here.
The Tree That Owns Itself
There are few will stories that are more uncommon than this one. Sure, there are plenty that deal with lots of money or those that resulted in big blowups, but how often is a tree deeded to itself?
As the story tells, if it was necessary there's no way this would hold up in court – trees can't legally own property, just to breach the surface of the issues – but it's been accepted anyway. The community had to create a special road to keep the tree in place, but they're okay with it.